[He might not realize she hasn't said Alderaan, even if the implication had been obvious, but Leia certainly does. She only looks even more suspicious at his poor denial, even though inside she's proud that he recognizes Alderaanian food on sight. Or on smell. Either way.]
[To no surprise to Kylo, what Leia decides to do is follow him right on inside and into the kitchen. She's seen him cook before, and she knows it's something he's both good at and likes doing, but it's still something that both surprises and interests her. Both her and Han aren't the greatest chefs (passable, yes, but she has a hard time imagining them not letting a droid cook most of the time back home), so it's interesting how Ben picked this hobby up.]
[Ren lets out a steadying breath in order to calm himself... or at least to temporarily suppress his irritation. He's had a few kitchen disasters in the past thanks to his temper, and he'd rather not ruin something he's almost finished.]
I don't make it because it's from Alderaan. And stay in the dining room, you'll be in my way in the kitchen.
[It's open enough that she'll be able to see and talk to him, so it's not the worst request-slash-demand he can make, at least. But as usual, he refuses to answer the question directly, because that means he'd have to acknowledge that she deserves some respect...]
[It's not the worst request he could make, and it's one Leia doesn't mind complying with in hopes of prolonging this visit. She moves barely outside of the kitchen, lingering by the doorway on the dining room's side, her attention fully fixed on Kylo and his cooking.]
[Kylo drops the dish Leia brought him down on the counter a little more harshly than necessary, but the noise doesn't bother him. He moves over to the stove and uncovers the pot there, stirring it with a utensil he'd left nearby. He's had to control himself under greater stress than this, he reassures himself.]
Some of it is palatable.
[After a brief taste, he pulls out a container of from the cabinet nearby and puts a few shakes of a spice into the stew. Focusing on what he's doing should help with his annoyance, at least. It usually does.]
[Leia frowns a bit at just how harshly that dish is dropped, but it doesn't break, so at least that's something. But her concern over the dish doesn't last long, instead replaced with a fascination as she watches Ben do his work.]
I'm glad to hear you like it. I'd hoped we would've shared some of that with you.
[well, she hasn't even shared much about Alderaanian food with Han back home, but she doesn't have many doubts that he'd find a few things, at least, that he'd like there.]
[Even if his words are as sharp as ever, the tone behind them is far more dull.]
On the rare occasions you deigned to spend time on me, you wouldn't let me forget about it.
[After another taste test, he apparently finds it good enough and simply stirs a few more times before covering the pot again and lowering the heat. He's not done in the kitchen, however; he retrieves a block of cheese from the icebox and pulls out a few other things to start grating some of it. At least he doesn't seem to be outwardly annoyed anymore... even if it's because he's willfully ignoring her presence.]
[And as expected, though she's heard these words from Kylo countless times before, they don't hurt any less, because Leia can't really make sense of them. It doesn't make sense from what she's seen from Han's memories and what she knows about them. Even if it's just Kylo's perception of his childhood, it's not one Leia wants him to have. There's a slight chill around where she's standing as she continues to watch him, but it's likely not something Kylo will notice just yet from inside the kitchen.]
I'm glad to hear it. There's a lot on Alderaan that I wish both you and your father could've experienced.
[Ren replies with his usual optimism—that is to say, none at all.]
There's little point clinging to the past. The only thing thinking of Alderaan will do is prevent moving forward.
[The past is set in stone, and trying to do something different with it, thinking of what ifs, none of that will help. Even if Ren doesn't think of himself as having much of a future, he refuses to go backwards.]
[It's the wrong thing to say, and she knows Ben knows that. Even though she knows he knows better, Leia can't help her temper. The cold from before is long gone, replaced with a low, spreading heat around her, spreading up the door frame she's leaning against.]
There's no moving forward without keeping Alderaan in mind.
[Not for her, at least, and she'd be sure to make sure it's the case for everyone else, too. If Alderaan is gone, then it won't be forgotten. The least she can do is ensuring the memory of her homeplanet serves as a warning of the horrors of the Empire and other groups like it.]
[He lets a slow breath out through his nose and mumbles to himself, shaking his head as he puts the cheese and grater down.]
And that was always the problem. [Ren endeavors not to continue this line of conversation as he moves to dump the grater in the sink, and he lets out a noise of irritation as he spots his own darkened shadow.
It's fine. He's mostly done in the kitchen anyway, so he steps away from the oven and counter lest his emotions do something stupid like rot his ingredients. He can wash his hands in the bathroom, so he turns and heads that way with his usual heavy gait.]
[Leia purses her lips, resisting the urge to sigh or otherwise react more than that to Kylo's response. Because she doesn't see it as a problem. She sees it as the very least she can do for a planet that had seemed the soul of the Republic, and for its remaining citizens.
Instead of being annoyed, when Kylo heads toward the bathroom, Leia heads into the kitchen to get a better look at whatever he'd been doing in there.]
[The stew is still simmering on the stove, and at closer inspection, Leia can find that while it does smell very similar to the dish she's familiar with, there's a slight difference that leans more savory than the traditional. Kylo knows what he likes.
Aside from that, the pile of cheese he's just grated is sitting on a cutting board, and if she glances at the oven, she might see a long shape inside, and the smell of baking bread shouldn't be too hard to detect soon enough.
By the time she's had a look around, Kylo will be staring at her, arms folded and a look of displeasure on his face.]
I would rather you not ruin my meal with whatever you may be feeling.
[... but something odd strikes him now that he's actually looking at her properly, and he tilts his head with a brief furrow to his brow, eyes scanning her face and neck.]
[She barely hears Kylo return while she's looking over everything he's making. It might not be completely traditional, but honestly, the mere fact that he's making something based off of Alderaanian food is enough to both have her interest and send her mind racing, thinking about what his early life must have been like.
She turns when he speaks, trying to hide her surprise. Which, really, isn't that hard the longer he's looking at her. Leia raises her eyebrows, meeting his scrutinizing glare with a slightly puzzled stare of her own. Because to Leia, there's nothing strange about the neckline of her shirt, or the lack of a scarf or anything of the sort. She hasn't worn anything around her neck for a good portion of her time here, not comfortable with that light pressure there.]
[Ren shakes his head, heading back into the kitchen as if she's not even there. Instead of the stove, however, he steps towards the refrigerator to retrieve something to drink.]
Do you intend to be cold?
[It's clear from his flat tone that he's judging. That probably wouldn't be a surprise even if he didn't almost constantly wear gloves and high collars.]
[Though it's a tone Leia is more than familiar with by now, the reason for it--aside from it being how he usually is--is something that isn't quite registering with Leia just yet. She has on long sleeves and other items appropriate for the weather, just nothing tight to her neck, and that being something Kylo might find strange isn't something she's aware of.]
Should I be worried about a sudden temperature drop in your kitchen?
[well, she knows it's possible, but that's something she's ignoring in favor of skeptically turning his question back at him in hopes of better answer.]
[He pulls out a bottle of some kind of juice and strides towards her, taking her by the shoulder to physically push her out of the kitchen as he heads out of it himself.
He has relaxing to do and he can't do it if she's here.]
[Even as stubborn as Leia is, it's obvious to her as it would be to anyone that even if she tried to push back or stand her ground to avoid being shoved out of the kitchen, it wouldn't work well. Kylo very clearly has the physical advantage here, and all things considered, it's not difficult to persuade her to leave the kitchen if it involves being near Kylo at the same time.]
It's not that cold outside. Certainly not compared with Hoth.
[Chilly, maybe, but nothing she can't deal with even without a scarf or high collared shirt. ...Not that that's a great standard, considering how willing she is to be uncomfortable if she thinks it's necessary.]
[He stops and practically scowls at her in disbelief, head tilted as if a different angle will reveal some sort of sensible answers. That's what she's comparing it too, really? Hoth?]
It's not as cold as Starkiller Base, either, but I still wear scarves.
[In any other situation, she may have been tempted to express her disgust at the mention of that monstrosity Hux created. (And honestly, she's still a little bit tempted) But more than the mention of Starkiller Base, her focus is on that last word, because now what he meant by those other questions clicks.
Leia glances away, just for a moment, a chill settling around the both of them as she tries to decide just what she wants to say in response to that. Because "hey remember how you force choked me and I died? that's why I don't like things touching my neck" really isn't what she wants to say to him.]
I don't find them comfortable. I can deal well enough without them, so there's little point in wearing one.
[Vague, yes, but she feels that might be enough to get across her meaning without actually coming out and saying it. Because she doesn't blame Kylo for actions committed while possessed--actions he seemed to regret when he returned to normal--and she doesn't want it to come across that way at all.]
[Ren gives her a look that essentially says he's judging, even if it's a mild thing.]
That's new.
[It doesn't appear that he immediately understands the implication; perhaps if it were half a year ago he might be more likely to recall it, but even things like the Reaper's still-active punishment have faded to the background in his mind, and the reasons behind it have followed them. As of late he hasn't had to confront all of that again, and for his own sanity he's all but blocked it out.
He steps over to the living room, not bothering to watch whatever Leia's reactions might be.]
[He can judge if he wants, because it's something she's come to expect from him. And while on one hand, she's surprised he doesn't catch on to her meaning, on the other, she's grateful that he hasn't. It's not something she wants him to remember and cope with all over again. But even still, she eyes him a bit suspiciously, looking to see if perhaps he's masking his reaction, not wanting her to see it.
And to help with that scrutiny, Leia follows into the living room. If he's not kicking her out yet, she's more than willing to stay.]
[There's something... off, he thinks as he slows, stepping into the living room and putting his free hand against his usual armchair. The chill that seems to be fading slightly must have come from something, and as he's said, a discomfort with scarves is new. He never knew of any issue she's ever had with things around her neck, and—
His expression twitches and he stops when he's halfway to giving her a suspicious glance of his own, and as a result he's frozen staring at her, mouth slightly open and his expression inscrutable other than a hint of realization.]
[Part of her wants to look away, to pretend that maybe he hadn't put together the reason for why she doesn't wear scarves or, well, anything around her neck. Because she hadn't wanted to remind him of that, and Leia herself was so used to it by now that she didn't give her wardrobe a second thought anymore.
But she doesn't. She keeps her gaze--sympathetic, and honestly a bit guilty, for reminding him of this in the first place--fixed on Kylo. Her lips press together tightly as the chill settles around them once again.]
It's not a problem. It's something I'm more than accustomed to by now.
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lostapprentice) wrote2035-01-06 02:37 am
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I didn't say I made something from Alderaan.
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His scowl only intensifies. The urge to continue to deny it is strong, but he can tell there's little point anymore.]
Never mention this to anyone.
[At that, he turns on his heel and storms into the kitchen, ceasing his attempts to close the door on Leia and leaving her to do as she wishes.]
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Do you cook food from Alderaan often?
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I don't make it because it's from Alderaan. And stay in the dining room, you'll be in my way in the kitchen.
[It's open enough that she'll be able to see and talk to him, so it's not the worst request-slash-demand he can make, at least. But as usual, he refuses to answer the question directly, because that means he'd have to acknowledge that she deserves some respect...]
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But you like that kind of food, don't you?
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Some of it is palatable.
[After a brief taste, he pulls out a container of from the cabinet nearby and puts a few shakes of a spice into the stew. Focusing on what he's doing should help with his annoyance, at least. It usually does.]
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I'm glad to hear you like it. I'd hoped we would've shared some of that with you.
[well, she hasn't even shared much about Alderaanian food with Han back home, but she doesn't have many doubts that he'd find a few things, at least, that he'd like there.]
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On the rare occasions you deigned to spend time on me, you wouldn't let me forget about it.
[After another taste test, he apparently finds it good enough and simply stirs a few more times before covering the pot again and lowering the heat. He's not done in the kitchen, however; he retrieves a block of cheese from the icebox and pulls out a few other things to start grating some of it. At least he doesn't seem to be outwardly annoyed anymore... even if it's because he's willfully ignoring her presence.]
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I'm glad to hear it. There's a lot on Alderaan that I wish both you and your father could've experienced.
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There's little point clinging to the past. The only thing thinking of Alderaan will do is prevent moving forward.
[The past is set in stone, and trying to do something different with it, thinking of what ifs, none of that will help. Even if Ren doesn't think of himself as having much of a future, he refuses to go backwards.]
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There's no moving forward without keeping Alderaan in mind.
[Not for her, at least, and she'd be sure to make sure it's the case for everyone else, too. If Alderaan is gone, then it won't be forgotten. The least she can do is ensuring the memory of her homeplanet serves as a warning of the horrors of the Empire and other groups like it.]
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And that was always the problem. [Ren endeavors not to continue this line of conversation as he moves to dump the grater in the sink, and he lets out a noise of irritation as he spots his own darkened shadow.
It's fine. He's mostly done in the kitchen anyway, so he steps away from the oven and counter lest his emotions do something stupid like rot his ingredients. He can wash his hands in the bathroom, so he turns and heads that way with his usual heavy gait.]
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Instead of being annoyed, when Kylo heads toward the bathroom, Leia heads into the kitchen to get a better look at whatever he'd been doing in there.]
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Aside from that, the pile of cheese he's just grated is sitting on a cutting board, and if she glances at the oven, she might see a long shape inside, and the smell of baking bread shouldn't be too hard to detect soon enough.
By the time she's had a look around, Kylo will be staring at her, arms folded and a look of displeasure on his face.]
I would rather you not ruin my meal with whatever you may be feeling.
[... but something odd strikes him now that he's actually looking at her properly, and he tilts his head with a brief furrow to his brow, eyes scanning her face and neck.]
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She turns when he speaks, trying to hide her surprise. Which, really, isn't that hard the longer he's looking at her. Leia raises her eyebrows, meeting his scrutinizing glare with a slightly puzzled stare of her own. Because to Leia, there's nothing strange about the neckline of her shirt, or the lack of a scarf or anything of the sort. She hasn't worn anything around her neck for a good portion of her time here, not comfortable with that light pressure there.]
What is it?
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Do you intend to be cold?
[It's clear from his flat tone that he's judging. That probably wouldn't be a surprise even if he didn't almost constantly wear gloves and high collars.]
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Should I be worried about a sudden temperature drop in your kitchen?
[well, she knows it's possible, but that's something she's ignoring in favor of skeptically turning his question back at him in hopes of better answer.]
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[He pulls out a bottle of some kind of juice and strides towards her, taking her by the shoulder to physically push her out of the kitchen as he heads out of it himself.
He has relaxing to do and he can't do it if she's here.]
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It's not that cold outside. Certainly not compared with Hoth.
[Chilly, maybe, but nothing she can't deal with even without a scarf or high collared shirt. ...Not that that's a great standard, considering how willing she is to be uncomfortable if she thinks it's necessary.]
Why do you ask?
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It's not as cold as Starkiller Base, either, but I still wear scarves.
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Leia glances away, just for a moment, a chill settling around the both of them as she tries to decide just what she wants to say in response to that. Because "hey remember how you force choked me and I died? that's why I don't like things touching my neck" really isn't what she wants to say to him.]
I don't find them comfortable. I can deal well enough without them, so there's little point in wearing one.
[Vague, yes, but she feels that might be enough to get across her meaning without actually coming out and saying it. Because she doesn't blame Kylo for actions committed while possessed--actions he seemed to regret when he returned to normal--and she doesn't want it to come across that way at all.]
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That's new.
[It doesn't appear that he immediately understands the implication; perhaps if it were half a year ago he might be more likely to recall it, but even things like the Reaper's still-active punishment have faded to the background in his mind, and the reasons behind it have followed them. As of late he hasn't had to confront all of that again, and for his own sanity he's all but blocked it out.
He steps over to the living room, not bothering to watch whatever Leia's reactions might be.]
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[He can judge if he wants, because it's something she's come to expect from him. And while on one hand, she's surprised he doesn't catch on to her meaning, on the other, she's grateful that he hasn't. It's not something she wants him to remember and cope with all over again. But even still, she eyes him a bit suspiciously, looking to see if perhaps he's masking his reaction, not wanting her to see it.
And to help with that scrutiny, Leia follows into the living room. If he's not kicking her out yet, she's more than willing to stay.]
Such as finding out you enjoy Alderaanian food.
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His expression twitches and he stops when he's halfway to giving her a suspicious glance of his own, and as a result he's frozen staring at her, mouth slightly open and his expression inscrutable other than a hint of realization.]
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But she doesn't. She keeps her gaze--sympathetic, and honestly a bit guilty, for reminding him of this in the first place--fixed on Kylo. Her lips press together tightly as the chill settles around them once again.]
It's not a problem. It's something I'm more than accustomed to by now.
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