[He doesn't... want to think about how his father might abandon him over what he'd done on Starkiller, or even just what he'd done to Luke's school. Ren knows he wouldn't be able to blame Han, but—]
Don't apologize. You're... I can't ask for you to be different.
[He's starting to come to accept that, as much as he wants the past to change. But he realizes that things were what they were, that nothing any of them did would have changed how Ren felt. He has to at least try to accept his past with his father, if just so he can move forward from his... death. Otherwise he'll never get any closure.
He wishes Supreme Leader was here to reassure him.]
no subject
[He doesn't... want to think about how his father might abandon him over what he'd done on Starkiller, or even just what he'd done to Luke's school. Ren knows he wouldn't be able to blame Han, but—]
Don't apologize. You're... I can't ask for you to be different.
[He's starting to come to accept that, as much as he wants the past to change. But he realizes that things were what they were, that nothing any of them did would have changed how Ren felt. He has to at least try to accept his past with his father, if just so he can move forward from his... death. Otherwise he'll never get any closure.
He wishes Supreme Leader was here to reassure him.]